Hey PARTY PEOPLE!!!!!!!

BOOBies
It sounds like you all are having an amazing time in Chicago!! I joined the bandwagon kind of late in the game to just fly all the way to IL and make my presence known. Most of you would be like "WHO ARE YOU?!?!?" Maybe next year EVERYONE will know ME!!!!!! bwahahahaha


Ramblings

So, what's been going on with me?! Oh nothing AND everything.

The band, I mean Edward Josh, EJ for short (I couldn't decide!), is really showing me what he's made of. I went in for a fill on Wednesday and besides bleeding like a stuck pig all over my pants (grrr), I'm now at a tight 6.2cc in a 10cc band. WHOAH RESTRICTION!!!!!!!!! I did my liquids like I was supposed to until Friday when I got the bright idea that going out to dinner would be a good thing. Needless to say, my 16mo old ate more of my meal than I did. It was challenging, but I think I ate enough calories that day.

This morning, I got stuck. The pisser?? It wasn't on damn food.

Backstory- I've been a real bitch lately. I mean like, HORRIBLE. I mean like scream at my family, cry for no reason, become super pissed off at EVERYTHING with a pulse type of bitch. My reasoning...I self-weaned off my happy pills. Why?!?!? Oh it's the same song and dance. I *thought* I didn't need them anymore. WRONG. I'm finding out I need them more than ever now. This band game is such an emotional rollercoaster that being the slightest off kilter hormone wise is a BAD, VERY BAD, idea. What's made this week even more miserable?? AF is starting to deboard the plane and will be arriving very soon. BITCH.

So, back to what I was saying. Stuck. Yesterday, my DH went to pick up my rx scripts and this morning I decided to start taking them. It was around 10am and I hadn't eaten anything. I was getting ready to head to the store with P1, so I took my meds with a sip of water. Immediately I started having indigestion. Then it became downright painful. Be Calm, Be Calm...that's all I could think of to do. I found DH's coffee and was thinking the warmth of it would help dissolve the bastards lodged in my pouch. Nope, didn't really help. I was already out the door at this point, so I pointed my car in the direction of the closest StrBcks and get a coffee. The first gulp was whip cream and OMG did it add to the pain. I then started the sliming and the pre-hurl wave of nausea came over me. I got off the freeway and pulled off to the side of the road. I wasn't about to barf all over myself in my car...again (this one time, in college.... ;)) Once I pulled over, I really started drinking the coffee and doing all kinds of sidebends, arm reaches, etc etc to work the devil candy through. FINALLY, I noticed relief was around the corner. I started back up the car and continued on my way. Whew...what a close call. That was THEE WORST episode to date.

I'm scared for tomorrow. I'm thinking I might take the pills at night, when EJ seems a bit looser, and I will certainly break them smaller than they already are, and surely take them one little piece at a time.


My Other Half

On another note...my DH has been DRIVING ME NUTSO!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

For the most part, we have a pretty good marriage. We've been married for over 8yrs and seem to compliment each other nicely. We've had our share of difficult times, but we've always worked hard to stay in love. He's a great father, and a great hubby most of the time. Where he lacks in some areas, he goes beyond in others. I'm sure I'm the same way. I know I'm not perfect. FAR from it, but here lately something about him is just pissing me off. It could be my lack of proper drugs, as aforementioned...but a part of it could be his lack of enthusisasm for my weight loss. He NEVER tells me that I'm getting smaller, or make the slightest compliment towards me...EVER. If he does say something, most of the time I have to solicit a compliment. Then in my eyes, it doesn't mean much because I had to fish it out of him. Know what I mean?! Plus, when I talk to him about ANYTHING, it's always met with a 'glass is half empty, or someone pooped in my glass' response. I'm getting pretty fed up with living with a debbie downer. Don't EVEN get me started on our sex life. That's an oxy-moron right there. That LIFE ended a while ago. Last night, in a fit of controlled rage....I finally blurted out that if he doesn't start having sex with me, I WILL be having sex with someone else. *SHOCKER*. I know, that was mean *see, told ya I was being bitchy*, and of course I don't have anyone lined up...but it just makes me SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO mad. I'm ALWAYS the instigator when it comes to frisky time. If I don't blantantly give him the green light, then it's like freakin' Death Valley here waiting for a drop of rain. NOTHING, ZERO, ZILCH, NADA. On a side note, our marriage has had that 'issue' from the beginning. My libido has always been way higher than his....it's frustrated me for some time on and off. After a new baby, it totally evens out...but now since our baby is almost 17mo..MAMA NEEDS SOME ACTION.

Most intelligent people would assume he's just not into me...and I've given him plenty of opportunities to tell me just that...but he assures me it's not. He thinks I'm great, and getting better (when I twist his arm!!!). I know he loves me. I'm pretty damn positive he's not getting it elsewhere, so I don't know what the problem is.

Uggghhhhhh. Well, I suggested he make a call to the MD and see about having his hormone levels checked out. Could be he's lacking testosterone and that could be the problem. Hell, SOMETHING. I love my husband, very much, and I'm praying that with the rebirth of my meds (if I can get the damn things down) and maybe with some medical intervention on his part, we can sync this love thang back up!!!!!!!!!

PROGRESS, NO?!

That's all for the night. OH- Just kidding!!!!!!!!!! PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Since it's starting to cool off around here, I decided to nix the capris and start with jeans!