Days since Band and I became One

My Scale

Friday, February 25, 2011

BYOC- My first, I think!

Thanks Amy!

1. Are you a heavy or light sleeper?

I'm a mom, is that really a question?! I sleep with one ear open at all times! (I know that doesn't make sense, but roll with it...) When I'm out though, I'm usually OUT. Pre-band, I was starting to sleep really bad. I was constantly in pain because I couldn't get comfy on my back or sides. I was always tossing and turning trying to get into a decent position and it never worked. I would always wake up with serious back pain. Not to mention tired as all hell because of the numerous times I would wake up. My children are awesome sleepers (thank GAWD) so I'm very thankful that 99% of the time when I say goodnight to them, I know I won't see their smiley faces until the next morning. Now, if only I could get my DH to stop tickling me in the mornings. You want to talk about pissing me off and putting me in a bad mood. Somehow he got it in his head that if he doesn't tickle me and pester the holy hell out of me, that I won't wake up. I finally had to tell him last Friday that I had had enough and that I'm going to start sleeping with something sharp and I WILL cut him if he doesn't stop. He's lucky he has been good this week and has left me alone because I was only SLIGHTLY joking. :>

2. If I were made into a professor for a day, what would I give my lecture on?

Today's topic class is would women really choose Edward over Jacob, and why?

3. What's a skill that you've wanted that you've never had.

I would really love to learn how to sew. Although I suck at fashion (you've seen bits of my wardrobe), I think sewing home decor would be awesome.

4. Have you ever been in a real catfight?

Emily and I lived one house down from each other from Kinder through 5th grade. If you were to take all that time we spent fighting, I'd say we probably lost a year somewhere in there. She was ALWAYS picking on me. Talk about BULL-LLYY. She was the baby of three and I think she had to learn to fight back. Since I was an easy target, I think she took advantage of that. So ya, we were always fighting. Then this other time, in HS I think it 7th or 8th grade, I was at B's house. There was another girl with us and we were watching a movie in her loft. Her parents were still at work. Well, I had to use the restroom and once I was done I tried to open the door and I couldn't. B thought it would be funny to hold the door and not let me out. Hardy-har-har. The first few minutes I got it. The next 5 I was starting to get pissed. Then after that expletives were flying and I started beating on the door. She lived in a townhouse and wasn't thrilled that the neighbors were probably hearing all the commotion. So of course she started getting angry with me because I wasn't playing nice. BITCH. When she finally let me out, the door flew open and the hair and nails started flying. It was ugly. I broke some nails and she was bleeding. Ugggghhhh. We used to be best friends, and although not as close, we still chat on FB. BITCH. hahahaha

5. Repeat question: Summarize your week in real life and blog land.

Week was pretty typical. I lost 2.5lbs this week, I did reach my goal of selling over $500 of Scentsy this month AND, drumroll please....2 more gals joined my Scentsy team!!! That wasn't so typical, but completely awesome!!!! I was born to be a leader, so Directorship here I come!!!!!!!! As for blog land, I've been better lately. I've posted like three times this week. Where's my cookie?!

More Pics

Eye-Openers. The left ones were taken almost a month after surgery, 7-23-10. The ones on the right were taken today (as I've labeled). A few days short of 7 months exactly.
This makes me want to cry. I remember taking that pic on the left and thinking I looked decent. I had lost a few pounds, so ya I was heavier, and here I thought I was the shit. OMG. Talk about warped body perception- Where others think they look horrible when they don't, I had the opposite problem. Thinking I looked good when it's SOOO obvious now I didn't. You know how guys use the term 'beer goggles' to describe a girl that looked hotter last night after a few beers than she does now waking up next to him, I totally think I had on thin goggles.
Now I know I'm thinner than I was before, but I'm no longer in that fat denial. I can see the work I still have before me. I just hope that when I do another comparison shot 6mo from now, my skinny girl now will be the fat girl later.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Who is this?!?

This photo on the left was taken almost a month before surgery and I have to tell you I was completely shocked to see how big I was. Granted, side shots are never attractive (nor are horizontal stripes, but I digress), I couldn't believe how large I was.

I just had to share. Amazing what losing 60lbs can do to change you.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Scale- You're Seriously Starting to Piss Me Off

I don't know what it is about me and the 200 number. My body just refuses to move past that gawd dang number!!! Again, history is repeating itself. I get to 197 and right then my body wigs out and says "OH NO 200s, DON'T LEAVE ME!!! We're SOOOO comfortable here and those 100s are all BITCHES!!!"

Uggghhhh, so frustrating. I was 204.5 this AM, which means it was 200.5 at DK's office. I just can't get past it!!!!! Maybe I need a slight fill. I've noticed I'm getting hungrier between meals and waking up hungry when I didn't use to be. I'm also starting to think about food again. You know, the thoughts of "ohhh, a ____ sounds really good with a side of _____" I thought I was past that, but I guess not. I tell you, it's a head trip getting past the 200s. Once I get to the 180s, I think the hardest part will be behind me. Lord, just get me to that dang number.

Hmmmm, other happenings.... First things first, I got a new Scentsy recruit today! WOOT WOOT! I'm 2 people short (and a few awesome sale months) of becoming a Director. I'm SOO close!! This weekend was also lucky and I scored some Taylor Swift tickets for my DD's birthday. Correction: Taylor Swift FLOOR seats!!! It's a surprise and she's going to FREAK OUT!! What makes it even more special is that my mom is flying out from CA to join us, so she's really going to love it!! I'm such a good little mommy. ;)

Anyway, so I'm starting to view others larger than me in a strange way. Well, that didn't sound right. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm looking at people I know differently. It's going to sound insane, but it seems like the more I shrink, the larger others are getting. I don't think they are gaining weight, they just appear to be bigger. Has that happened to anyone else?!?! My how your perception changes when you're obese and less obese.

What I'm also noticing about me is my attitude and no-nonsense tells-it-like-it-is mentality. I've always been ballsy, but now I've seemed to grow another pair!! Case in point, I was at Claire's of all places buying some headbands for my DD and her friends. The line was SUPER long & crazy and there appeared to be two lines to checkout. I walked up to the line and I asked a woman if this was the end. She said yes and motioned to the kids that were behind her. I could have sworn she said there was another line 'over there'. So I went 'over there'. As I was waiting for a bit, some Amazon blond teen and her shorter friend came up next to me. I said I was in line. Then they walked away and got in line behind the first lady. Anyway, long story longer, there was only one line. I told the first lady that I was behind her and she mentioned the kids behind her were with her. I said that's fine and I'm right here and I'm glad we're all in agreeance. WELL, the first lady checks out and then I notice Amazon blonde and her friend were behind the first lady. I'm thinking "where the heck did they get off jumping in line when I said I was behind the first lady". So anyway, when it was my turn I walked up. I had 4 headbands. Nothing major. Anyway, as I'm walking up I hear this "Excuse me, THEY are next in line." I'm shocked and look over at her and first lady is referring to Amazon blonde and friend. I said "no they weren't, they just walked up when I was already here" and she said "No, they are with me." I, in all my sassy-ness said "I'm sorry, I'm already here and this will only take a minute." She was shocked and couldn't say anything and I was bracing for it. I kept waiting for the "Excuse me fat bitch, blah blah blah" but you know what, she was speechless!!!!! hahaha Well, it turns out the headbands were mis-marked and not priced at what I thought they would be, so I ended up leaving and not taking them. But, in true T style, I said as I swaggered out "See, now I'm leaving & everyone is happy!"

Ya, I'm a bitch with balls, two pairs actually. :) Oh Lord help the world when I'm 140 and REALLY hawt & sassy!!!! My poor hubby! JK, I'm really sweet, sometimes. ;) I've never been one to be easily intimidated or shy away from confrontation due to my size. I don't see that becoming an issue in my future either!!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Finally, Damn it

I'm in One-Derland. 197 as of this morning, to be exact.


I had this epic post planned for the day that I reach under 200lbs. I really did. It was going to be complete with HUGE fonts, tons of exclaimation points, etc etc... But here it is, like a week of being under 200 and I'm just now telling you about it. Boo.

I guess because I look in the mirror and although somewhat smaller, I'm still fat. Being slightly under 200 when you're 5'1" doesn't change that. I'm not going to get all pissy-missy on ya, and I'm VERY grateful to be under 200 than over 300 like I was heading, I just thought I would feel better-er. Look better-er. Don't get me wrong, I know it's a huge accomplishment. I realize that, it's just hard to get excited about it. The last time I was under 200, it was VERY short lived. It's almost like I don't want to get too attached to that because I'll gain it all back in a few months like I always have. Anyway, it's still hard to believe.

It's almost been 8mo since I was banded. 8mo and 65lbs later. Size 26 to now a size 14/16/18 (ya, I'm all over the place.). I've now lost more weight than I have left to lose to get to my goal of 140. Which means I am more than halfway to my goal. INSANE. Really, freakin CRAZY.

I really need to post some pics. I think blogs with pics are better. lol We had a computer keel over last week and my DH has been working on it. When I'm back in business, I'll be able to post the scary boy shorts and sports bra pics. Brace yourselves people, they aren't for the faint of heart. Shiver. :/

So, I hope everyone had a nice Valentine's. I was spoiled. Surprised with a lunch date, a new Pandora bracelet and a charm, a homemade lobster AND crab leg dinner and roses. After 10+ yrs, he's finally learning. Too bad AF was on her way that evening and I was an irritable beeotch. Oh well, can't win them all. He understood and I think that was the best present of them all.

I've had a few highlights this week. The biggest one is

I'm going to my FIRST Josh Groban concert!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've loved him from the beginning but have never had the chance to see him in concert (read: never shelled out the money to be in the fanclub that enabled me to first come seating). Yesterday, I bought myself (and P1) tickets and get this.....


That is super close to me. Few times in my life have I been closer: the Wiggles when P1 was 3 and we had front row center (a miracle). & NKOTB when I was 14 and I had 7th row (they were playing at Six Flags and no one knew who they were, so total accident!). I digress....

16th ROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I didn't have to sell P2 to pay for them either! Life is good!!

The second good thing this week was my mini-Scentsy convention to gear up for Spring. What an amazing meeting. I'm realizing more and more what a fabulous company Scentsy is and I'm VERY fortunate to be a part of that. It's changing my life.

In fact, everything is changing. My body is changing. My mind is changing, and I know it's a good thing.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

I'm a weather wimp

It's cold here. Damn cold. I mean like butt-ass-naked cold. I believe it's 15^ out and it's the second day the kids have been banned from school because of the snow and ice. Plus, did I mention I'm sick?? I went to the dr Monday and they said it was just a virus. I've been hacking up my lungs since Saturday with no relief in site. My chest just feels so heavy and tight. It's awful.

My baby girl has been sick too. She started on Sunday with sudden vomitting. YUCK. She did OK at school on Monday until she got home and proceded to throw up all over the floor. She missed my laptop by mere inches. HORROR!!! Yesterday she was barf-free, so we might be on the upswing. Please please. I can't deal with anymore barf!!

So, as I was saying about the cold. I live in Texas and it's not supposed to deep freeze here. Alas, it is. The officials don't expect us to thaw until Friday. Grrreat. No work for me means no money. :( I'll be damned if I'm going to use all my vacation time the first week of February either. DAMN! So, we shall see what happens. I work for a decent private company and I'm hoping they will make some exceptions for us poor saps with kiddos! Wish me luck!

So the scale has been wonky lately. I'm up a pound, down two, up one, down one. It's all over the place. Yesterday I saw the scale read a glorius 201.5 Nothing like a freakin dangling carrot. Today, I was back up to 203.5 WTF. I had two homemade beef tacos. Guess that's what did it. Darn. Oh well, they were good. After soup for two stinking days (and my BP being up when I went to the dr. btw. Grrrr), I knew that 201.5 wasn't the real deal anyway. I'm SOOO close to One-Derland and now I feel the scale and the scale gods are just messin' with my little brain. So close, yet SO far away!

Hope you all are doing well out in Blogland. I wish some of you were local. I need some friends, some bandster friends to hang out with and especially to work out with. Sigh. :( Until then...... Stay warm and stay healthy!

I got an award!

So I was nominated by the sweet gal at Fitby40 for this Stylish Blogger Award. I'm not sure how 'stylish' I am, but I'm taking it and running with it!! Thanks hon! So, now I need to tell you 7 things about myself and nominate 15 others!
1. One of my favorite movies of all times in Spaceballs. I've seen it like a gazillion times (mostly because it was my baby bro's fave movies when he was little and he used to watch it every day after school. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.) haha Use the Schwartz.
2. I love dogs. I love the idea of a dog, but dogs stink. I don't care how clean you make them with grooming and whatnot, they still stink. Hence, I don't own a dog. If I go to your house, and you have dogs, inside dogs. Your house stinks. Just saying. :) I'm sure you'd say the same about my house with cats. But oh well, I love my kittie-witties.
3. Boys are gross, but I love them. I'm glad all I have are girls. I couldn't imagine raising a boy.
4. Poltergeist and Hell Raiser scared the bajeezus out of me when I was younger. I can't watch them even now. Yep, I'm a chicken. My DH wanted my DD (8) to watch Poltergeist last October and it was almost a brawl in my house because of it. I didn't want her traumatized (like I was at 10) and he didn't see what the big deal is. After arguing about it for a day (I know, we're dumb), and her clammoring to watch it and prove something to her chicken mother, she watched it. It didn't make me feel better when she said it was silly and called it PolterGeese. Really, how can you be scared of a movie about Polter-Geese?!?! :/ Oh, and it gives me chills when she says in her soft voice, with her hand covering and uncovering her mouth quickly while saying "Mommy, Mommy, where are you?". SHIVER.
5. I really hate to pee. Imagine how much time we would have in our days if we didn't have to stop & make time to pee! When I was younger, I used to call it "That annoying job". I know, I have issues. And now I have to pee. Grrrrrr.
6. I have this weird thing about old food. Let me clarify. I just threw away an entire box of Special K cereal. I just opened it today. DD2 and I had a bowl, but I thought it tasted 'old' so I threw it away. Now, the date did says 9/2010 so it's been in there awhile, but it hadn't been opened. I'm sure to a normal person, it was just fine. But since I knew how old it was, I could taste it.
7. I can't stand ANYTHING Ren-Faire-ish. Midieval Times is a place you will NEVER see me at. Dungeons & Dragons, sorcery and Ma-lady crap is just that. I can't STAND that stuff. I think it stems back to my first boyfriend who was a stupid role-player and he was one of the dorks that dressed up to go to the local Ren-Faire. I'd rather DIE. DIE I TELL YOU!!! hahahah No offense if you like that stuff, but man alive...I HATE IT!!!
Now to nominate 15 others. Watch your comments, you might be next!